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A marriage is more likely to succeed if the woman follows her own star and remains conscious of her wholeness than if she constantly concerns herself with her husband’s star and his wholeness. ~ Carl Jung, Conversations with C.G. Jung, Page 51.
In a marriage neither partner sits on a throne. ~Carl Jung, Jung-Ostrowski, Page 52.
Emma’s death was the worst relationship loss that Jung ever experienced. Nothing is worse than losing your congenial daily companion and, after fifty-two years of very meaningful and deeply related marriage, it must have been almost more than most old men of eighty could have recovered from. ~Barbara Hannah, Jung: His Life and His Work, Page 233
At the inception of their relationship, Toni Wolff was not interested in marriage and having children. She was critical of what she had observed of marriage: it seemed to make men less active and less enterprising- merely content with being fathers. It made both men and women less interested in culture. ~The Black Books, Vol. I, Page 31
Soul-connections outside the marriage are absolutely legitimate in the second half of life. ~Carl Jung, Sabi Tauber: Encounters with Jung, Page 102
A woman who cannot include her soul in intercourse is mere anatomy. Women must have an enormous claim. Sexual intercourse in the second phase of life can oftentimes feel deeply humiliating for the wife in a marriage, if she functions as the legitimate prostitute of her husband. One must see it absolutely as it is. The real marriage begins where adultery seems to take place. At that point a true, real relationship may begin, actual love begins! ~Carl Jung, Sabi Tauber: Encounters with Jung, Page 101
For a man, the mother “protects him against the dangers that threaten from the darkness of his soul.” Subsequently, the anima, in the form of the mother imago, is transferred to the wife: “his wife has to take over the magical role of the mother. Under the cloak of the ideally exclusive marriage, he is really seeking his mother’s protection, and thus he plays into the hands of his wife’s protective instincts.” What is ultimately required is the “objectification of the anima.” ~Carl Jung, The Black Books, Vol. I, Page 100-101
On January 5, 1922, Jung’s soul advised as follows: “You should not break up a marriage, namely the marriage with me, no person should supplant me, least of all Toni. I want to rule alone.” “You must let Toni go until she has found herself and is no longer a burden to you.” On the next day, his soul elucidated the symbolic significance of the relations between Jung, Emma Jung, and Toni Wolff in terms of Egyptian mythology. ~The Black Books, Vol. I, Page 96
In contrast to a marriage, Toni Wolff saw her relationship with Jung as an “individual relation.” ~The Black Books, Vol. I, Page 96
Marriage is socially, legally, psychologically accepted. Nothing new can come from there; it can only be transformed, also individually, through individual relationships. That is why the individual relationship is a symbol of the soul. ~Toni Wolff, The Black Books, Vol. I, Page 96
After having children, women often didn’t need their husbands, and their own problems tended to return. Her mother hadn’t learned to work and had consequently plagued her children with unused libido. Toni Wolff was also critical of the bondage of marriage. ~The Black Books, Vol. I, Page 31
In the eyes of the ordinary man, love in its true sense coincides with the institution of marriage, and outside marriage there is only adultery or “platonic” friendship. For woman, marriage is not an institution at all but a human love-relationship. ~Carl Jung, CW 10, Para 255
Relationship is possible only if there is a psychic distance between people, in the same way that morality presupposes freedom. For this reason the unconscious tendency of woman aims at loosening the marriage structure, but not at the destruction of marriage and the family. ~Carl Jung, CW 10, Para 273
Anima and animus have fallen back into the unconscious of men and women, where, as Jung showed, they create complications in people’s relationships. To this we can ascribe the enormous number of shattered marriages we see around us today. ~Marie-Louise Von Franz, Archetypal Dimensions of the Psyche, Page 220
Hierosgamos. Sacred or spiritual marriage, union of archetypal figures in the rebirth mysteries of antiquity and also in alchemy. Typical examples are the representation of Christ and the Church as bridegroom and bride (sponsus et sponsa) and the alchemical conjunction of sun and moon. ~Carl Jung; MDR; Page 395.
Marriage is no help in this, one does not reach it in that way, for we have deceived ourselves when we find our own feminine in a real woman. Carl Jung, ETH, Page 115
You have experienced in your marriage what is an almost universal fact-that individuals are different from one another. Basically, each remains for the other an unfathomable enigma. ~Carl Jung, Letters Vol. II, Page 27
. If one partner loves someone outside the marriage, it is his very own, personal business, perhaps following his innermost law. No special ‘gestures’ are needed, like touching, sexual intercourse etc.; they do not matter. The subjective inner truth is the absolute essence (independent of gestures); that is the innermost freedom. This problem reaches everybody who has a claim to spirituality – precisely because it means spiritual growth. ~Carl Jung, Sabi Tauber: Encounters with Jung, Page 101
I said last time that marriage did not end the young man’s difficulties. I said this in order to show you I am not under the illusion that people who have undergone treatment with me glide through life forever afterwards on golden wheels! ~Carl Jung, ETH, Page 183.
Seldom or never does a marriage develop into an individual relationship smoothly and without crises. There is no birth of consciousness without pain. ~Carl Jung, CW 10, Para 331
Marriage is indeed a brutal reality, yet the experimentum crucis of life. I hope you learn to endure and not to struggle against the suppressing necessities of fate. Only thus you remain in the centre. ~Carl Jung, Letters Vol. 1, Page 172.
My parent’s marriage was not a happy one, but full of trials and difficulties and tests of patience. ~Carl Jung, Memories Dreams and Reflections, Page 315
As a country parson he [Jung’s Father] lapsed into a sort of sentimental idealism and into reminiscences of his golden student days, continued to smoke a long student’s pipe, and discovered that his marriage was not all he had imagined it to be. ~Carl Jung, Memories, Dreams and Reflections, Page 91
On the question of Hitler’s attitude toward women and marriage, Jung prophesied: “He cannot marry. Hitler’s real passion, of course, is Germany.” ~Carl Jung, Jung: A Biography, Page 305.
In all my eighty years,” Barbara Hannah attested, “I have never seen a marriage for which I felt such a spontaneous and profound respect. Emma Jung was a most remarkable woman, a sensation type who compensated and completed her husband in many respects.” ~Gerhard Wehr, Jung by Gerhard Wehr, Page 423
What I mean by this is that every epoch of our biological life has a numinous character: birth, puberty, marriage, illness, death, etc. ~Carl Jung, Letters Vol. II, Page 208-209.
The dogma of the Assumption of the Virgin Mary, promulgated by Pope Pius XII in 1950, contains several allusions to the “heavenly marriage,” thus proving how the unconscious world of images reasserts its timeless significance as a dark counterpart to the spiritual world of Christianity. ~Carl Jung, Jung’s Last Years, Page 68.
The very fact that a man enters into a marriage on trial means that he is making a reservation; he wants to be sure of not burning his fingers, to risk nothing. ~Carl Jung, CW 10, Page 112
While Mary had suffered from asthma since childhood, Paul had suffered from his parents’ mismatched marriage, and their separation and divorce. ~William Schoenl – C.G. Jung-His Friendships with Mary Mellon & J.B. Priestley, Page 4
The Jewish conception of the religious relationship with God as a legal contract (covenant!) gives way in the Christian conception to a love relationship, which is equally an aspect of the marriage with God. ~Carl Jung, Letters Vol. II, Page 483.
Then after a pause, Miss Wolff added this: “You know, sometimes if a man’s wife is big enough to leap over the hurdle of self-pity, she may find that her supposed rival has even helped her marriage! This ‘other woman’ can sometimes help a man live out certain aspects of himself that his wife either can’t fulfill, or else doesn’t especially want to. As a result, some of the wife’s energies are now freed for her own creative interests and development, often with the result that the marriage not only survives but emerges even stronger than before!” ~Toni Wolff, C. G. Jung, Emma Jung and Toni Wolff – A Collection of Remembrances, Pages 47-51
He [Peter] wrote that since his marriage to Anne, this compulsive character in relation to his sexual libido had entirely disappeared. In this new marriage a true home-coming had taken place in both his inner and his outer life. ~Diana Baynes, Jung’s Apprentice, Page 268
Why aren’t they told betimes that the “prince of this world” and lord of the air” takes good care that the tastier morsels are snapped up by the wicked ones they envy so much, and that marriage is not the end but the beginning of the romance? ~Carl Jung, Letters Vol. 1, Page 370.
On the question of Hitler’s attitude toward women and marriage, Jung prophesied: “He cannot marry …. Hitler’s real passion, of course, is Germany.” ~Carl Jung, Jung: A Biography, Page 305.
Peter and Anne were married shortly before Christmas in 1931, at the Registry Office in South Kensington. The only other person present at their marriage was Joe Henderson. ~Diana Baynes, Jung’s Apprentice, Page 253
Clearly coniunctio represents an archetypal image of the development of the human intellect, which expresses sometimes as sacred marriage, sometimes as mystical or chemical wedding, the deepest longing of mankind, be it more erotic or-with no contradiction-more religious or even more technical and chemical in emphasis. It is always the combination of what has been separated, by means of which the individual is raised to a higher state, that of wholeness or selfhood. The outward process-be it a technical operation or a religious act-becomes the symbolic expression of an inward state, and even more: of a mysterium that encompasses the dimensions of both inner and outer and provides a hint of the unus mundus, the reality of a unified world. ~Carl Jung, Jung by Gerhard Wehr, Page 400
At about that time Jung’s autobiography, Memories, Dreams, Reflections, was published. In it I came upon a passage which helped me overcome feelings of guilt and gave me the courage to end my twenty-three-year marriage. ~Jane Reid, Jung My and I, Page 557
From my work with women patients, I learned how important an emotional marriage with the father, or with his substitute (the first man in a woman’s life), is vital for feminine development. ~Jane Reid, Jung, My Mother and I, Page 103-104
Jung’s two colleagues, Peter and Cary de Angulo, both involved in the translation of Jung’s books into English, and both left with the care of a young child, make a ‘sensible’ marriage. ~Diana Baynes, Jung’s Apprentice, Page 195
He [H.G. Baynes] came to Jung originally because his first marriage had run on the rocks while he was in service abroad. ~Diana Baynes, Jung’s Apprentice, Page 147
(It had been Godwin’s fond hope that Rosalind could be influenced by Jung, just as he had been, and that this would save their marriage. However, this did not prove to be possible.) ~Diana Baynes, Jung’s Apprentice, Page 123
It was this friendship with Cary that enabled Peter to recover from the trauma and guilt which he suffered Chapter Fourteen – A new Marriage: Cary de Angulo 197 in relation to Hilda’s death and soon the friendship blossomed into love. ~Diana Baynes, Jung’s Apprentice, Page 196-197
Cary was American, a woman of Peter’s age and in a similar situation: her first marriage had come to an end in 1924, although she remained on friendly terms with her ex-husband Xaime De Angulo. ~Diana Baynes, Jung’s Apprentice, Page 196
Joe Henderson comments that Peter ‘tended to think that the marriage was what Jung would want him and Cary to do and Jung said himself to me once that he had no such idea at all. ~Diana Baynes, Jung’s Apprentice, Page 210
Finally, they came to a decision together and Cary and Peter were married on Saturday March 19th, 1927 at Marylebone Town Hall. The only witnesses to this marriage were his dear, loyal sister Ruth and her friend, Bertha. ~Diana Baynes, Jung’s Apprentice, Page 198
‘I can see we ought to submit the question of our marriage to the elders of the tribe, as it were, because that is also a question of social ethic and in such things we have to submit to extra personal authority.’ ~Peter Baynes, Jung’s Apprentice, Page 246
Something of the vulnerability and sadness of this beautiful girl [Agnes Leay] had entered Peter’s soul and it was soon after his marriage to Cary that he began to dream of her as his anima or soul guide. ~Diana Baynes, Jung’s Apprentice, Page 220
Joe [Henderson] had become a confidante of both Peter and Cary and he was probably one of the first people to know that their marriage was on the rocks. ~Diana Baynes, Jung’s Apprentice, Page 215
It was soon after his marriage to Cary that Peter was already having fantasies about a beautiful young woman called Agnes Leay (who had some years previously been a patient of his). ~Diana Baynes, Jung’s Apprentice, Page 213
I shall not recover his [Jung] friendship, I think, because he could not agree with my ending my marriage and my entrance into a new life with a new and young partner.’ ~Peter Baynes, Jung’s Apprentice, Page 248
In a talk Peter had with Toni Wolff, she too had made it abundantly clear that she felt this marriage would end in disaster. ~Diana Baynes, Jung’s Apprentice, Page 248
It is a bad sign when doctors begin writing books of advice on how to achieve the “perfect marriage.” Healthy people need no doctors. Marriage today has indeed become rather precarious. In America about a quarter of the marriages end in divorce. And the remarkable thing is that this time the scapegoat is not the man but the woman. She is the one who doubts and feels uncertain. It is not surprising that this is so, for in post-war Europe there is such an alarming surplus of unmarried women that it would be inconceivable if there were no reaction from that quarter. ~Carl Jung, CW 10, Para 248
This time with Emma and Jung was the first opportunity for Anne and Peter to meet with them as a foursome. It was especially important for Peter who was still unsure whether his marriage to Anne had created a barrier between himself and Jung. ~Diana Baynes, Jung’s Apprentice, Page 285
Although Emma had, ultimately, wholeheartedly supported their marriage, Jung still had reservations about it. ~Diana Baynes, Jung’s Apprentice, Page 285
Very often these changes are accompanied by all sorts of catastrophes in marriage, for it is not hard to imagine what will happen when the husband discovers his tender feelings and the wife her sharpness of mind ~Carl Jung, CW 8, Para 783
Most men are erotically blinded—they commit the unpardonable mistake of confusing Eros with sex. A man thinks he possesses a woman if he has her sexually. He never possesses her less, for to a woman the Eros-relationship is the real and decisive one. For her, marriage is a relationship with sex thrown in as an accompaniment. ~Carl Jung, CW 10, Para 255
Henry Miller said “I have been debating whether or not to give you the message I received this morning. As I sat at my work table thinking over my plans for the day a voice spoke to me saying, ‘I have a message for Maud Oakes.’ On the other side of the table I saw an elderly woman resembling Madame Blavatsky [the famous psychic] who had come to me before in fantasy. Her message was that if you went to Peru you would experience danger, despair, destruction, disillusionment and disaster. In the end however, things would change and there would be some kind of marriage.” ~Maud Oakes, The Stone Speaks, Page 2
Traditionally, man is regarded as the marriage breaker. This legend comes from times long past, when men still had leisure to pursue all sorts of pastimes. But today life makes so many demands on men that the noble hidalgo, Don Juan, is to be seen nowhere save in the theatre. More than ever man loves his comfort, for ours is an age of neurasthenia, impotence, and easy chairs. There is no energy left for window-climbing and duels. If anything is to happen in the way of adultery it must not be too difficult. In no respect must it cost too much, hence the adventure can only be of a transitory kind. The man of today is thoroughly scared of jeopardizing marriage as an institution. ~Carl Jung, CW 10, Para 248
Nobody but the absolute believer in the inviolability of traditional marriage could perpetrate such breaches of good taste, just as only the believer in God can really blaspheme. Whoever doubts marriage in the first place cannot infringe against it; for him the legal definition is invalid because, like St. Paul, he feels himself beyond the law, on the higher plane of love. But because the believers in the law so frequently trespass against their own laws, whether from stupidity, temptation, or mere viciousness, the modern woman begins to wonder whether she too may not belong to the same category. ~Carl Jung, CW 10, Para 265
Secretaries, typists, shop-girls, all are agents of this process, and through a million subterranean channels creeps the influence that is undermining marriage. For the desire of all these women is not to have sexual adventures only the stupid could believe that—but to get married. The possessors of that bliss must be ousted, not as a rule by naked force, but by that silent, obstinate desire which, as we know, has magical effects, like the fixed stare of a snake. This was ever the way of women. ~Carl Jung, CW 10, Para 251
The transformation I have briefly described above is the very essence of the psychological marriage relationship. Much could be said about the illusions that serve the ends of nature and bring about the transformations that are characteristic of middle life. The peculiar harmony that characterizes marriage during the first half of life-provided the adjustment is successful-is largely based on the projection of certain archetypal images, as the critical phase makes clear. ~Carl Jung, CW 17, Para 337
The young person of marriageable age does, of course, possess an ego-consciousness (girls more than men, as a rule), but, since he has only recently emerged from the mists of original unconsciousness, he is certain to have wide areas which still lie in the shadow and which preclude to that extent the formation of psychological relationship. This means, in practice, that the young man (or woman) can have only an incomplete understanding of himself and others, and is therefore imperfectly informed as to his, and there, motives. As a rule the motives he acts from are largely unconscious. Subjectively, of course, he thinks himself very conscious and knowing, for we constantly overestimate the existing content of consciousness, and it is a great and surprising discovery when we find that what we had supposed to be the final peak is nothing but the first step in a very long climb. ~Carl Jung, CW 17, Para 327
For this purpose, the biological parents are replaced by spiritual parents; godfather and godmother represent the intercessio divina through the medium of the Church, which is the visible form of the spiritual kingdom. In the Catholic rite even marriage where we would suppose it to be all-important that this particular man and this particular woman become united and are confronted with each interfered with by the Church; the intercessio sacerdotis prevents the immediate contact of the couple. The priest represents the Church, and the Church is always in between in the form of confession, which is obligatory. This intervention is not due to the particular cunning of the Church; it is rather her great wisdom, and it is an idea going back to the very origins of Christianity that we are not married merely as man and woman; we are married in Christo, ~Carl Jung, CW 18 Para 362
I own an antique vase upon which an early Christian marriage is represented. The man and the woman hold each other’s hand in the Fish; the Fish is between them, and the Fish is Christ. In this way the couple is united in the Fish. They are separated and united by Christ; Christ is in between, he is the representative of the power which is meant to separate man from merely natural forces, ~Carl Jung, CW 18 Para 362
I hope you will find time to commit your plant counterparts to the earth and tend their growth, for the earth always wants children-houses, trees, flowers-to grow out of her and celebrate the marriage of the human psyche with the Great Mother, the best counter-magic against rootless extraversion! ~Carl Jung, Letters Vol. II, Page 320
Although we are still far from having overcome our primitive mentality, which enjoys its most signal triumphs just in the sphere of sex where man is made most vividly aware of his mammalian nature, certain ethical refinements have nevertheless crept in which permit anyone with ten to fifteen centuries of Christian education behind him to progress towards a slightly higher level. On this level the spirit—from the biological an incomprehensible psychic phenomenon—plays a not unimportant role psychologically. It had a weighty word to say on the subject of Christian marriage and it still participates vigorously in the discussion whenever marriage is doubted and depreciated. It appears in a negative capacity as counsel for the instincts, and in a positive one as the defender of human dignity. Small wonder, then, that a wild and confusing conflict breaks out between man as an instinctual creature of nature and man as a spiritual and cultural being. The worst thing about it is that the one is forever trying violently to suppress the other in order to bring about a so-called harmonious solution of the conflict. Unfortunately, too many people still believe in this procedure, which is all-powerful in politics; there are only a few here and there who condemn it as barbaric and would like to set up in its place a just compromise whereby each side of man’s nature is given a hearing. ~Carl Jung, CW 18, Para xii
Woman nowadays feels that there is no real security in marriage, for what does her husband’s faithfulness mean when she knows that his feelings and thoughts are running after others and that he is merely too calculating or too cowardly to follow them? What does her own faithfulness mean when she knows that she is simply using it to exploit her legal right of possession, and warping her own soul? She has intimations of a higher fidelity to the spirit and to a love beyond human weakness and imperfection. ~Carl Jung, CW 10, Para 270
This picture [as mandala] was done by a seven-year-old boy, offspring of a problem marriage. He had done a whole series of these drawings of circles and hung them up round his bed. He called them his “loves” and would not go to sleep without them. This shows that the “magical” pictures still functioned for him in their original sense, as a protective magic circle. ~Carl Jung, CW 9.1, Para 687
Finally, the elucidation of the conscious material comes to an end when neither the analyst nor the patient can contribute anything further of decisive importance. In the most favourable cases the end comes with the formulation of the problem which, very often, proves insoluble ~Carl Jung, CW 4, Para 528
The best examples of such regressions are found in hysterical cases where a disappointment in love or marriage has precipitated a neurosis ~Carl Jung, CW 4, Para 569
Hecate is a birth-goddess (), the `multiplier of cattle,’ and goddess of marriage. In Orphic cosmogony, she occupies the centre of the world as Aphrodite and Gaia, if not as the world-soul itself ~Carl Jung, CW 5, Para 577
Her close relation to the moon-goddess suggests that she was a promoter of growth. Hecate was the first to bring Demeter news of her stolen daughter, another reminder of Anubis. Hecate herself is, on occasion, a goddess of marriage and birth ~Carl Jung, CW 5, Para 355
The safeguard against the unconscious, which is what his mother meant to him, is not replaced by anything in the modern man’s education; unconsciously, therefore, his ideal of marriage is so arranged that his wife has to take over the magical role of the mother. Under the cloak of the ideally exclusive marriage he is really seeking his mother’s protection, and thus he plays into the hands of his wife’s possessive instincts. His fear of the dark incalculable power of the unconscious gives his wife an illegitimate authority over him, and forges such a dangerously close union that the marriage is permanently on the brink of explosion from internal tensioner else, out of protest, he flies to the other extreme, with the same results ~Carl Jung, CW 7, Para 316
. . . The relation of Mars to Venus can reveal a love relation, but a marriage is not always a love relation and a love relation is not always a marriage. ~Carl Jung, CW 8, Para 879
In the realm of the Mothers he finds the tripod, the Hermetic vessel in which the “royal marriage” is consummated. But he needs the phallic wand in order to bring off the greatest wonder of all the creation of Paris and Helen. ~Carl Jung, CW 5, Para 182
For, in the relationship now reigning between them, there is consummated the immemorial and most sacred archetype of the marriage of mother and son. What, after all, has commonplace reality to offer, with its registry offices, pay envelopes, and monthly rent, that could outweigh the mystic awe of the hierosgamos? Or the star-crowned woman whom the dragon pursues, or the pious obscurities veiling the marriage of the Lamb? ~Carl Jung, CW 9ii, Para 22
Indeed, at first it seemed to be an almost mortal blow to Jung. In all my eighty years, I have never seen a marriage for which I felt such a spontaneous and profound respect. Emma Jung was a most remarkable woman, a sensation type who compensated and completed her husband in many respects. I also esteemed her very highly and loved her as a friend. ~Barbara Hannah, Jung: His Life and His Work, Page 233
Jung experienced his parents’ marriage as fraught with unhappiness and tension. He diagnosed his own childhood eczema as a somatic consequence of his parents’ marital turmoil. When Jung was three, his father and mother temporarily separated; Jung’s mother was hospitalized for several months during that time, most probably as a consequence of her marital problems. ~Claire Douglas, The Woman in the Mirror, Pages 27
On the question of Hitler’s attitude toward women and marriage, Jung prophesied: “He cannot marry. Hitler’s real passion, of course, is Germany.” ~Carl Jung, Jung: A Biography, Page 305.
Carl and Emma Jung at the time of their marriage, February 14, 1903. Emma took on the task of transcribing the voluminous notes Jung made during his hospital rounds. The following year they had their first child. ~ Arthur I. Miller, Deciphering the Cosmic Number, Page 23
Oh this bitterness! You [Jung’s Soul] have dragged me through sheer and utter Hell, you have tormented me nearly to death- and I long for your thanks. Yes, I am moved that you thank me. The hound’s nature lies in my blood. Therefore I am bitter. For my sake, since-how does it move you! You are divine and devilishly great, wherever and howsoever you are. I am only your prison guard, your eunuch doorkeeper, no less imprisoned than you. Thrice damned marriage! Speak, you concubine of Heaven, you divine monster! Have I not fished you from the swamp? How do you like the black hole? Speak