- I. 22.
[I]. I feel that I must speak to you. Why won’t you let me sleep, since I’m so weary? I feel that the disturbance comes from you.
What induces you to keep me awake?
S. Now is no time for sleep, for you must wake and prepare important matters in night’s opus. The great work begins.
[I]. What great work?
S. The work that must now be undertaken. It is a great and difficult work.
There is no time to sleep, if you find no time during the day to remain in the work.
[I] . But I had no idea that something of this kind was taking place.
S. Yet you might have noticed by the fact that I have been disturbing your sleep for a long time.
You have been too unconscious for a long stretch. Now you must go to a higher level of consciousness.
[I]. I’m ready. What is it? Tell me!
S. Now listen closely: to no longer be a Christian is easy. But then what? For more is yet to come. Everything is waiting for you.
And you? You remain silent and have nothing to say. But you ought to speak up. Why have you received the revelation?
You mustn’t hide it. You busy yourself with the form? Has the form ever been important, when it is a matter of revelation?
[I]. But you are not thinking that I should publish what I have written?
That would be a disaster. And who would understand it?
S. No, listen!
You should not break up a marriage, namely the marriage with me, no person should supplant me, least of all Toni. I want to rule alone.
[I]. So you want to rule? From whence do you take the right for such a presumption?
S. This right comes to me because I serve you and your calling.
I could just as well say, you came first, but above all your calling comes first.
[I]. But what is my calling?
S. The new religion and its proclamation.
[I]. Oh God, how should I do this?
S. Do not be of such little faith. No one knows it as you do. There is no one who could say it as well as you could.
[I]. But who knows, if you aren’t lying?
S. Ask yourself if I am lying. I speak the truth.
[I]. But also tell me what I could do.
S. First let me get your mind off things.
[I]. So do that.
S. You should get used to working with me on a regular basis, not with Toni, or anyone else. Otherwise you’ll never sleep.
You must work with me, so that you’ll change. You’re still not so suitable for the great work.
[I] . If only you would talk to me about it.
S. How can I, if I don’t have your strength? You shouldn’t give it to others, but to me. This you do through working with me.
Will you promise this?
[I] . I promise. But you must give me back sleep.
S. I’ll do that and more.
[I]. Must I go on persevering or will you grant me some sleep?
S. Not yet, we haven’t :finished. What has today granted you?
[I]. It was beautiful and I felt good.
S. What have you given me? Nothing. How can you then hope to sleep?
[I]. I realize that now and will make amends, as you see. But what do you expect from me?
S. I expect only your focus, beyond that you’d be waiting on me.
[I] . But what should I expect from you? I already asked you to tell me about the great work that awaits me, and you gave no answer.
S. As I said, I need your focus and strength on a regular basis, or else I can do nothing for you. Calm yourself and lie down.
Perhaps you will sleep. But tomorrow you must show up here again for serious, sober work. The Black Books, Vol. VII, Page 210-211