Toni Wolff wrote her analysand a second long letter
Dear Katy, 22 January 1937
I am so sorry that you are ill again and will try to write an analytical letter to give you a little comfort.
Though I don’t think you need much explanation, as you do see everything well for yourself and analysed your dreams very clearly.
I am sorry you got punished for having been too nice to the Fraulein by getting the flu in having to enter her room.
But on the other hand, to be a hermit for a while is what you desired and probably needed too after all these ‘revelations.’
And too after a dose of St. Moritz life, which must have been a bit too much, coming right after your very quiet life in Zurich.
Of course you are right too when you say it is better to go out once in a while so people can’t say you don’t care a damn when de T. is not with you.
But now the flu has solved that problem for the time being.
But on the other hand, you can’t act the very jolly person who cares nothing whether de T. is with you or not when his absence makes all the difference.
Such are the complications of life and real feeling – that is probably the reason why you tried to keep the feelings at bay and made reason the basis of your attitude – as of course lots of people do.
Feelings mean more complication, but also more fullness and depths – I mean of course your own individual feelings, and not those social ones where one is just “nice” to people ….in your dream must represent your former society person side, which has grown apart from you.
Her having to have a baby might mean that the social side is coming up in a new way – which it has done already, for your insight into people makes you relate to them again, only in a very new and individual way.
That would refer to the mandalas in the room also.
You must not expect “loving” feelings to people to come through again.
Your insight into their unconscious would prevent that.
But you have a much fuller realization of their whole personality as you have into your own – when you can see the good and the bad in them ….I think, I thought you were a sensation type because you repressed your intuition so much, as it made you vulnerable.
And also because up to now you really had the attitude of a French woman with very much common sense and being almost too reasonable. (The money situation, your feelings for de T. and the social side.)
I only hope D.’s visit will not interfere with your coming down to Zurich to the carnival party, it would be an awful pity.
As for D. coming too I am rather uncertain whether she would fit into our group, you know she is so easily shocked, and of course at such a party no one can be expected to treat her specially, she would have to be just like any other person. . ..
The dream of B. shows you a girl who hasn’t given a damn about her birth and went all along on the individual way – probably rather a bit too much.
But in association with her you discover these men’s pajamas which you try first to give away, but finally remain with you, for your own use if made smaller.
That means a more masculine attitude, firmer and more self-dependent, as a man has to have in regard to the world …. I think you are right about C. in the dream and all it involves.
Though I wonder if in reality you would decline a party which is given by C.
That is to say, if you analyse the dream by taking C. subjectively your analysis is perfectly correct.
But as C. is a person whom you meet in reality and who belongs very much to the Analytical group I think you have to take her also objectively, and then the meaning might be a bit different.
I should say that then one is led to different conclusions, the sum of which would be that you ought to get somehow in contact with C. socially, not analytically.
The party would be a chance to do that, for instance.
By the way I don’t think C. likes parties and gatherings more than mildly; in a way she does, but in a very introverted sensation type way.
She enjoys herself being in a group, but does not make much effort to do something about people.
This attitude of an introverted sensation type might be quite useful to study.
And don’t forget too that as C. she is always somebody – perhaps too much only the wife of her husband, she likes to be taken on her own values, but on the other hand, it is of course much simpler and easier than it is for a person who like you has no husband along upon whom one can rely and who does create the social situation.
This may be a difficulty you undervalue, probably because in the USA it is the women who make the social situation.
But in Europe it is very much the men.
A married woman is always getting her persona by the social position and profession of her husband.
I do hope you can come to the party, you just belong to it and we would feel decidedly that something were missing if you were still not well to come down.
But I do hope rather that D. is not coming, I don’t think she could get into our atmosphere.
Do take care of yourself and enjoy the days in bed in your room.
I am quite well and we don’t have much flu here.
I am trying to get my dancing a bit refreshed – took a course before Christmas. E. really encouraged me. F. and G. were also coming.
Our teacher is going to St. Moritz next week to lead the international dancing competition she had organized.
Love and good wishes,
Toni ~Toni Wolff, Jung My Mother and I, Pages 142-144
Carl Jung Depth Psychology Blog
